DOMELGABOR - FATHER & SON is a folk songwriter-style ballad about a father and son's relationship
DOMELGABOR - FATHER & SON is a folk songwriter-style ballad about a father and son's relationship.
DOMELGABOR - FATHER & SON is a folk songwriter-style ballad about a father and son's relationship. The song is a message from a father speaking to his son, which feels personal, honest, emotionally grounded, intimate, regretful, and protective at the same time.
This song holds a deeply personal meaning for me, as it reflects my journey with my son. However, I crafted it in a way that allows others who may have gone through similar experiences to connect and relate to it.
The relationship between a father and son can be complex and challenging, particularly during the teenage years. These relationships are often complicated by emotional unavailability, high expectations, and traditional masculine ideals that prioritize toughness over closeness.
Challenges often arise from generational differences, competition, unresolved childhood issues, and ineffective communication, leading to emotional distance, conflict, or a consistently intricate dynamic.
However, despite all my flaws and my own internal battles against myself and my old demons, with the passing years I tried to get better, spending time together when possible, sharing activities during vacations, and trying to engage in more direct and open conversations, even when difficult, to help heal deep wounds between us.
While trying to listen and understand his points of view, I also tried to explain my situation for him to acknowledge my own struggles and mistakes to help foster a better reconciliation.
Despite our differences and disagreements, I have always supported him and will continue to do so. Even if I appear distant occasionally, my love for him and his sister has remained constant and unbroken since their birth.
Regardless of what occurs between us, they will forever be my children, my flesh and blood, and I will always be there to assist and guide them both, if and when they allow me to.
Growing up with divorced parents meant I also lived in various households, adapted to new family dynamics, and dealt with psychological and emotional challenges like stress, anxiety, and anger. This situation cultivated an early need for self-sufficiency and independence but also led to a lack of self-confidence, self-esteem, and self-love. So, in some ways, I can understand what he and his sister have been through.
These issues have had a lasting impact on my relationships with family, friends, and others, especially with my children. Even now, in my 50s, despite feeling more comfortable in my own skin than I did in my 30s and 40s while still married and living together, these effects have tremendously decreased but still persist in some ways.
However, the necessary separation from my wife led to over three years of depression, during which I became withdrawn and isolated, seeking solitude, although I continued to care for my children. The transition to a new apartment and adapting to this new life took much longer than expected, affecting both the children and myself, as well as our relationship.
Fortunately, time often resolves problems by providing space for emotions to fade, allowing perspective to change, and enabling natural, self-correcting outcomes to occur, often reducing the urgency of initial worries and issues. Of course, it also comes through human actions and decisions, patience, determination and hard work at trying to change my attitude and behavior, allowing for a mental reset and finding solutions. And it succeeded; our relationship improved as he (and I) matured. While not perfect or free of disagreements, it is better now than it ever was.
After completing high school and earning his bachelor's degree, he left Hong Kong, where we reside, to study in France. There, he had to rapidly adjust and become completely independent. I believe that the distance and newfound independence contributed positively to the situation; being free from his parents' constant supervision provided him with the freedom he had long sought to escape the home environment, which has been necessary and very beneficial.
I'm very happy for him. We have always focused on providing him with a very good education, putting him in a very good international school for which we had to lose an arm and a leg every month to pay for it (and his sister), but it paid off, as, despite the situation at home, he has always been one of the best in his classes and has always been determined to succeed and pursue his own ideas and dreams, and he worked hard to do it. We never went against his decision; on the contrary, we have always accompanied him and given him access to what he wanted. And we will do everything we can to help him (and his sister) succeed. He is on the right path, and that's all the matter!
This song is my means of expressing my apologies to him, hoping for his forgiveness. Regardless of the circumstances, I want him to know that I love him, wish him well, and am here to provide help and support no matter what.
I typically don't use photos of myself or my children for album covers, but this song holds such personal significance that I chose to feature this old picture of us. He was likely 3 or 4 years old at the time, and this image is deeply sentimental, bringing back memories of him as a child, when we were a family filled with happy moments. This song is dedicated to you, my son.
The end of this song sums it all up: "Forever and always, through sun and rain, your father’s love for you, son, will remain."
Lyrics
"FATHER & SON" by @domelgabor Lyrics
I still remember the day you were born
I made a promise in prayer to the gods
I was so proud you came into this world
Lying in my arms like a miracle unfurled
As the years went by, I watched you grow
Mesmerized by the world through your eyes
You bloomed into a light, making our world glow
Even when I struggled to say what burned inside
Still, I was always there by your side
Behind every step, trying to be a good father
Proudly watching you grow into a teenager
Amid what broke us apart from your mother
I never knew what to say or how
I carried more than I could show
If I seemed distant over the years
It was only so you'd learn to grow
We decided to part ways with your mother
To end the fighting and endless despair
You took it hard, you took it bare
Our bond took a toll; I failed to repair
I blame myself for the emotional damage
For you and your sister, so hard to manage
Yet through sacrifices and hard decisions
You grew up strong with solid foundations
Speaking was never easy for me
But I was there through every storm
Behind my awkward love was only
The best way I knew to keep you warm
Then you left the nest, spread your wings free
To start a new life and study in another country
Despite the silence and lack of communication
You still have all my love and admiration
Growing up, my situation was similar
With a father who struggled to talk to his son
And now I'm growing older with a son
Who has difficulty talking to his father
Words still don't come together easily
To show the love I carry so deeply
But no matter where life pulls them farther
I'll always be here for my son and daughter
I'll do everything I can to help you
Make your hopes and dreams come true
As long as I'm able, if you'll let me through
I'll always be there to guide you
Even though you've reached adulthood
You'll always be my child, my flesh and blood
Forgive me for the love I struggled to show
The battles I fought, the wounds I never sewed
I was losing my way as I fought my demons
But there is no easy way out of this situation
The past cannot be undone or rewritten
But know I've tried through silence and pain
Forever and always, through sun and rain
Your father's love for you, son, will remain
Lyrics: Dominique B S Noel (aka DOMELGABOR)
Music and voice(s): SUNO (AI-generated)
Where to listen to "FATHER & SON" by @domelgabor?
"FATHER & SON" by @domelgabor 2026
Is now available on YouTube
Also on Spotify
And soon on Apple Music and most music platforms.
Your Support Means Everything
I hope you will like this song and maybe relate to it, some of you.
Your ongoing support and willingness to listen to my music mean the world to me. It's a reminder that we are all on this creative journey together.
You're welcome to leave a comment with your thoughts or stories.
Let's keep exploring, sharing, and inspiring one another. Thank you for being a part of this experience.
Peace!
Dom
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